Vanity of a Tomboy: Beauty in a man's world

*cues James Brown*

Life is a funny thing and I want to preface by saying this really is a more or less a life wide observation that turned into rant. I debated posting this but I think in this life I lead of being girl engineer/ business owner that while most of it's very good, I can't ignore the challenges I still face.

Somewhere along the way alot of us heard this notion that it's books or looks for us girls.  I was one of the few who believed it, and while to this day I've never been called ugly to my face, I was simply more concerned about being smart than pretty.  Add to this some of the inane pick-up lines I've heard "You're to pretty to be a nerd"  I was convinced “books” were the way to go. Don't get me wrong, I dress nice and when it's time to dress up I think I do quite well.  By the time I finished college I realised how silly this "books or looks" idea was. Presidents, Lawyers, and secret agents are often good looking and intelligent, so why not me? A woman who takes pride in her looks is thought to not have much depth, though many times this theory has been disproved.

I'm often thought of as having low self-esteem because I wear clothes that are too big for me (partly coz I've lost  29lbs in the past 9 months) or I usually dress quite boyish. In a response that sounds quite the opposite of low self-esteem, I know if I wear a dress somebody is gonna look at me and I don't like it when people look at me. The person who looks at me may make a pass and if I complain, lookers-on of any gender will shrug or even find it amusing. Maybe part of it is astonishment at how some go after chubby girls like me. In general though it's more of the "well you wore it, you had it coming" that goes along until something happens.

Everyone gets up in arms about how women should be treated better and be aware of their own strength. You know that same strength that gets referred to bossiness, stubbornness, or plain ornery   Once a man sang (loud) to me on buses and then cursed my name because I didn't swoon to his advances. He kept trying to sit next to me and put his arm around me. Everyone else on the bus laughing or simply ignoring. Even the bus driver not saying a word, except for later that evening when I saw the bus driver again to look at me say "Well I can see why he was trying so hard, bet you have someone waiting at home for you"  That was the last day I ever ties and heels on a bus. Once I had to punch a guy on a date for being fresh, to be fair I warned him twice and the bartenders took my side. Yet for weeks, other regulars would joke "Watch out for her".

I never thought it was fair  by dressing up and looking nice, in fitted jeans or a dress, stockings, and heels, that I should expect unwelcomed flirtation. It's not amazing that I have an engineering degree, 3 years in construction, all while "maintain my girlish whimsy" (direct quote), it's simply the product of hard work and staying true to myself.

It just bothers me that my grandmothers had to deal with this in different lights. Maternal had the add issues of being a black woman, whereas my Paternal dealt with being known as a "dragon lady" My mother had to deal with it even after she was married which lead into some (now) entertaining conflicts when my parents moved to Georgia. My sister, and me, and my cousin in college. Admittedly, I've not had to deal with near what some women endure in their personal/professional lives.  I look at my god-daughter sometimes and wonder if things will better in  20 years.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

― Eleanor Roosevelt, This is My Story

*steps down from soapbox*

Engineered Cupcake: Upcoming Markets

It amazes me everyday just how well Engineered Cupcake has taken off. Baby showers, dinner parties, business meetings, and just last weekend GRID Alternatives' Bay Area Volunteer Appreciation Party. These are just a sample of the events that we've been pleased to have our goodies at.  Some of the popular items as of late include:

• Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars
• Irish Cream Brownies
• Chocolate cupcakes with Strawberry buttercream
• Vanilla Cupcakes with Vanilla Buttercream
• Oatmeal Cookies
• Vegan and Gluten Free Coco-Hazelnut mini cupcakes

This Saturday we will once again be at the BAHM in Berkeley at the Fireside Art Collective, alongside some of our fellow cottage food buisnesses. Last time there were no musicians so perhaps to compensate this time there will be 2. In planning the menu I wanted to focus on goodies that are great for Memorial Day weekend. Whether you'll be chilling at home with a bbq, going a day hike or camping or headed to the beach, these treats are sure to make your holiday sweet! pun so intended.

At long last the menu for this Saturday's Bay Area Homemade Market or as I like to call it "The Saturday Nite BAHM!" It's memorial day weekend and we've got the goodies to make your BBQ, camping trip, or beach trip a truly sweet holiday. 

Irish Cream Brownies ($1 each)- sold out at the April BAHM

Chocolate cupcakes with Strawberry Whipped Buttercream($1 mini $2 regular) - anyone who was at GRID Alternatives volunteer appreciation party knows about these

Strawberry Shortcake Cupcakes(Vegan) 

($3- regular) - fresh strawberries in this fluffy cupcake and coconut cream center and icing

Blueberry Cornmuffin (Gluten Free)

($2 - each)

A fairly traditional offering as Engineered Cupcake will also be at the Oakland Indie Awards on May 30 and I don't want to succumb to baker's fatigue, lol. Still working on the menu but here's a special sneak preview. Oh and we have to sell everything pre-packaged so things will be in half dozens and/or dozens.

• Cappuccino Chip Cookies
• Vegan and Gluten Free Cocoa Hazelnut mini cupcakes
• White cupcakes with Vanilla Buttercream

Still working on the rest of the menu plan.

Hope to see you Saturday at the BAHM!

Lessons of Lavender

I'm in the midst of test baking some new creations for Engineered Cupcake with some new flavour combinations and ideas.  It's funny, I was really worried I'd have trouble coming up with new ideas when I started this business. However my mind has been springing with tons of new ideas, so many my Trello can barely deal.

Whenever I think of Asheville (one of my truly favourite places on this planet), I think of lavender. It's a calming, clean, natural scent and it's everywhere "up in them there hills" so much they had a Lavender festival.  for several years. With lavender I'm learning less truly is more.

This week I've made two batches of lavender brownies 1 vegan and 1 gluten free. This asheville lavender lingers, it's quite potent.  I used lavender sugar and lavender compound butter and overall it came out a bit too sweet and strong. The gluten free was far better than the vegan, must've been all that butter. lol.

You can't tell but these infused with scent of lavender

Still, as one who likes lavender (if you like gin,lemongrass, spring mix salads, and citrus in your chocolate you're probably in that category) I liked these brownies and they're going fast.

I'm looking forward to a test batch of a white cake with this lavender butter for a special recipe I'm making for a baby shower in June. With a lavender blueberry buttercream. That will have to wait however because I'm all booked up for the week with about 8 dozen regular sized and mini cupcakes to make between now and Saturday. And planning menus for the BAHM and Oakland Indie Awards

Cornmeal scones

I know I promised this recipe last week, I got caught up in pre-Easter orders and a baby shower.


Yesterday was Easter in  Orthodox Christianity and it meant a break from fasting. For the past six weeks I've abstained from hard liquor, Dairy, meat, basically any animal products. Admittedly had a few slips mainly due to lack of vegan food being in my presence as my blood sugar descended. Over all I did pretty well and I was ready to celebrate. For dinner I had lamb burgers with bleu cheese, roasted Brussel sprouts, and sweet potato gnocchi seasoned with butter and sage. It was a delicious Easter dinner.  Ironically I wasn't really craving dessert moreso thinking of the morning and my craving for cream scones.  So I set to make the recipe that made convinced I could like a scone. Before I had a cornmeal scone, I thought of scones as big dry semi-sweet biscuit. These have a textural contrast that is amazing.  There also good with fresh blueberries instead of dried cranberries


Ingredients

• 250g self rising flowur
• 50 grams fine cornmeal
• 100 g granulated citrus sugar* 
• 100 grams dried cranberries soaked and drained
• 240 ml half & half cream, milk, or whipping cream
• 1 large egg
• 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
• coarse ground cornmeal (polenta) for topping)

*Citrus Sugar
I usually use 60g of citrus sugar but I was feeling ambitious they turned out a bit too sweet for my personal liking but the general audience seemed to think they were fine.

There are 2 methods I use to make orange sugar. The slow method: rub in 2tsp of zest from citrus fruit ( I used 1 lemon and 1 lime) into sugar keep in a glass for at least 2 days before using. The quicker method is what i used this time. I used my magic bullet (with the cross blade) you could use a food processor.

Procedure

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C)
2.  place the oven rack in the center of the oven. 
3. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, cornmeal, sugar, 
4.  Add the currants to the flour mixture and stir well.
5.  In a small measuring cup whisk together the cream, egg, and vanilla extract. Add this to the flour mixture and stir just until the dough comes together.
6. With #20 scoop spoon dough onto parchment lined baking sheet or sheet pan. about 1/2" apart
7.  Sprinkle each scone with a bit of coarse ground polenta. 
8. Bake on  for about 15 or until golden brown and a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Remove from oven and transfer to a wire rack to cool.

All the pretty flours: Corn

Blueberry Cornmuffins

Cornmeal.  For Engineered Cupcake it just might be the 2nd most used flour, often in gluten free goodies like our Lemon blueberry corn-muffins, which are honestly the best blueberry muffins I've ever had in life.and the fact that this belle occasionally just has to have some cornbread in her life. I
make a corn muffin that in the words of one Southerner: "will make you believe in the Good Lord" I love Southern talk. With all the corn meals and flours there are 3 distinctions: whole grain or degerminated: most cornmeal is degerminated but if it's whole grain it's best to store it in the fridge so the oils don't go rancid. grind: how coarse the grind is and Nixtamalization. Big word ne? It basically means the grain (in this case corn) has been
soaked in an alkaline solution and hulled. This makes it easier to grind, the flavour is improved, and absorbable nutritional value increased. It's a key part of tortilla making. Closer to my own culture, grits are a nixtamilized corn product.


You'll notice that many "cornbread" recipes have about a 5:1 ratio of flour:cornmeal recipe. But because it's more dense and has such a strong flavor it's soundly a cornmuffin.

Cornstarch (Cornflour in the UK) The exception is in British and Australian recipes where the term "cornflour" is used synonymously with the U.S. word cornstarch.Cornstarch is the starch derived from the corn (maize) grain. The starch is obtained from the endosperm of the corn kernel. Corn starch is a popular food ingredient used in thickening sauces or soups, gluten free baking. It's also the anti-caking agent for powdered sugar. In fact you can make your own icing sugar by taking regular sugar about 1 cup and adding 1tbsp of cornstarch. Yes, this is the same starch you can use for your clothes. Personally I use 1/2 cup to 1 quart for my button down shirts and bow ties

American Cornflour A powdery flour made of finely ground cornmeal, NOT to be confused with cornstarch. Corn flour comes in yellow and white and is used for breading and in combination with other flours in baked goods. Corn flour is milled from the whole kernel, while cornstarch is obtained from the endosperm portion of the kernel. Masa Harina is a special corn flour that is the basic ingredient for corn tortillas. White corn flour blends well with other food ingredients and can be blended with wheat flour to reduce gluten for cakes, cookies, pastries and crackers. White corn flour is used as a filler, binder and thickener in cookie, pastry and meat industries.


Cornmeal: not as fine as American cornflour this is what I use in my cornmuffin recipes. Pay attention though as "cornbread mix" is not pure cornmeal but has wheat flour, sugars, etc.

Coarse ground cornmeal: Used for topping muffins, preventing pizzas from sticking. It's a bit too coarse to be the main attraction in most baked goods but it adds a nice textural contrast.


Later this week I'll post one of my favourite cornmeal scone recipes.